Had a much less stressful appointment on Tuesday. Of course, as expected it wasn’t without it’s tear-works. Those Phillips girls know how to put on a waterworks show even with positive and hopeful news. After waiting for 45 minutes to get in to see the Dr. and then playing musical exam rooms we finally made it to the ultrasound room. Now, while I’m sure every woman in the known universe will tell you that the T.V. (no I don’t mean television) ultrasound is far worse for the woman and that the man should just shut up and be glad he’s not sitting on the table in her place…I beg to differ. Now before the horde attacks me with indignation at the nerve I could have at even saying such a preposterous thing, let me explain by letting you in on the male thought process while sitting in the tiny cramped room full of medical equipment:

“I hate doctor’s offices. At least that’s not me sitting up on that table half-naked with tissue paper sticking to me. Oh, crap. Did I say that outloud? If I did she’s going to kill me. La la la la la la la la la la. NASCAR. Football. Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue. I could so use a beer. Where the hell is this doctor so we can get the hell out of here. I wonder who won the football game last night. Oh wait, the wife is talking to me. What did she say? Quick, I need an answer.”

“I love you dear!”

“That should do it, always distract them with the ‘I love you.’”

Says the wife, “Are you even listening to me? What did I just say?”

“Oh crap, crap, crap!”

Now, women don’t seem to understand how hard it can be to fake paying attention sometimes, and then if we’re ever caught, we have to work on the fly to come up with some excuse by distracting you with things that you rarely here after the wedding day. The sweet little nothings you long for but only hear when we’re looking for something in return, like silence while trying to watch the television. That’s a lot of stress. A LOT of stress. Clearly more than the meager amount you may be facing while waiting, not for the ultrasound, but rather for a photograph of you unborn child(ren). Whom, by the way, you are sitting and deciding on names for. You don’t even know the sex yet and already you are coming up with your short-list of names. In the meantime while you are filled with excitement over seeing the little one(s) floating around and forgetting about the hell they are putting your body through as you are amazed at the miracle of life, contemplating whether you like ‘Bill,’ ‘Billy,’ or ‘William’ better. The male is still thinking about how he’s going to avoid the wrath of a crazy, emotionally unstable pregnant woman. All the while hoping that he makes it home alive and in one piece.

Right, totally not why you are reading this though is it? Okay. Fine.

Update – The Next Two Weeks

Dr. Maddox is on-board and completely non-judgemental and on board with whatever decisions we make. He will do what is necessary for a positive outcome for our babies. So, here’s what is coming up.

1. Thursday, August 27, Edie is getting the first-half of her first trimester screening done to identify risks for chromosomal abnormalities (i.e. Down’s Syndrome).
2. Thursday, September 10, Edie is getting a nuchal translucency test. Which looks for the possibility of fetal abnormalities (i.e. cardiac issues). Neither are sure things and only identify possiblities.
3. Friday, September 11. Edie is scheduled for her cerclage. It will be an outpatient service and should only involve being in the hospital for a few hours at most. Upon returning home that afternoon bed rest will commence for the ‘long haul.’

If all goes well, Edie will be on bed rest at home for quite awhile. If the cerclage is not holding its own than she will be hospitalized for close supervision, but everything is being taken one step at a time. By our request, she will be watched over by both the hopeful and positive OB and the depressing Grinch of a high-risk specialist. Together, we hope they will be able to effectively extend the pregnancy and provide all the information necessary to deliver these babies in a timely manner. Here’s hoping two heads are better than one.